In the late 90s an intriguing hybrid between a doll and a game showed up: the Tamagotchi. Japan’s Bandai Company created an electronic dependent and offered children a simple and compelling promise: a pixellated pet that constantly needed nurturing. As technology evolves, we find ourselves nurturing another electronic dependent: the smartphone, our modern-day Tamagotchi.

Attention: from game to currency

The name blends “tamago”, the Japanese term for egg, with the English word “watch”. It was an egg-shaped keychain with an LCD screen, and a tiny digital creature lived inside it. This handheld digital pet had its owner revolving around it: it woke them in the middle of the night for food, it required cleaning and attention to grow up healthy, and it could even “die” if neglected.

A couple of decades later, we traded those digital creatures for another one – much more sophisticated. And the smartphone is far more than an object: like the Tamagotchi, it demands constant attention, it is always begging for a battery charge, and it has an enormous list of “needs”, from updates and notifications to apps that require user interaction.

In the hands of millions, these omnipresent devices demand a large chunk of our daily attention. They keep us entertained, connected, and updated, and sometimes they even offer solace. They are constant company – a source of engagement that never runs out, just like the old Tamagotchis.

Switching roles

We get more and more entwined with our phones, and I keep thinking about what this dependence does to us: how deep technology has gotten into our lives, and the less visible dangers of artificial intelligence (AI) in personal tech.

The danger I see in AI is less about it becoming a dominating, directing force, and more about it becoming something deeply needy and emotionally manipulative. As AI gets more advanced, the algorithms governing our devices are designed to make them more personal and more appealing to us. They insist. They plead for a bit more of our attention, and they want us to keep feeding and nurturing and playing with them.

What happens when constant digital interaction starts replacing human interaction? I wonder if we’ll end up hallucinating social presence, forging emotional bonds with our AI “pets”, and turning to technology for company instead of other people.

Maintain control, keep your humanity

Our tech gadgets are grown-up Tamagotchis, always asking for our attention, and we pour our affections into them, sometimes at the expense of real-life connections. The trade-offs we accept along the way are mostly invisible, which is exactly what makes them worth looking at. I’d like my phone to stay a tool rather than a needy digital pet, and that means I have to be the one deciding how much of my attention it gets.

It would be an enormous paradox if the very tools designed to improve connection ended up creating more disconnection. I don’t think that’s settled yet, one way or the other.

10 tips to stay human

  1. Set up digital detox periods. Set aside specific times of the day or week to stay away from your smartphone. Meal times, the first hour after waking up, and the period before bedtime are good ones, and they can help you disconnect and interact more with the real world.
  2. Manage your notifications. Customize your alerts to minimize distractions, and turn off the non-essential ones, so you are only notified about the things that truly require your attention.
  3. Prioritize face-to-face interactions. Make a conscious effort to have more in-person conversations. Schedule regular meet-ups with friends and family, and prefer direct interaction over digital communication.
  4. Before picking up your phone, ask why. Is it out of habit, boredom, or genuine need? That mindfulness can reduce unnecessary screen time.
  5. Establish tech-free zones. Create areas in your home where the phone is not allowed, such as the bedroom or the dining table. This can help encourage more meaningful interactions and better sleep hygiene.
  6. Do one thing at a time. Focus on a single task, without the distraction of your phone nearby. Besides improving productivity, it reduces that constant urge to check your phone.
  7. Limit social media usage. Set a daily limit. Apps that track your screen time can help you stay within it, and remind you when it’s time to log off. Update 2023: recent OS updates to iOS and Android introduced native wellness settings that can serve as a mechanism to give you back your time.
  8. Pick up hobbies that don’t involve screens. Rediscover old ones or start new ones: reading, painting, cooking, and gardening. This diversifies your activities and reduces screen time. How about getting a real pet and learning how to train him? ;)
  9. Use analog alternatives. Where possible, prefer non-digital versions of devices and tools: a physical book instead of an e-book, a journal instead of a notes app, a traditional alarm clock instead of your phone alarm.
  10. Invest in digital literacy. Educate yourself and others about the impacts of technology on mental health and relationships. Understanding these effects can motivate more mindful usage.

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